Coping with the coping

It is very hard to rationalize being on this drug. I know so few people who take medication, and are open about it. I feel different. I am smiling, and usually I don't smile. I feel like I didn't earn this sensation, this feeling.

It is something that I only struggle with understanding at night.

During the day I feel fantastic and lucid.

At night, I wonder if I am doing the right thing.