Indication

(A young artist I admire.)

These words that I write out, they are drafts of present tense feelings always being rewritten. Usually never edited, they just get rewritten, updated, and presented potentially for the world, but really for no one. Isn't that the idea of the internet?

I wouldn't say this is the best indication of the "I" all the theorists inject into their papers. The "I" , I inject into my non-theories which are subjective experiences. Sorry. "This" refers to exactly what this is. The act of writing, the thought that my ideas mean something.

Am I more than my thoughts, or are my thoughts more than me? Are these thoughts I have right now something I surpass? Am I better than these feelings? Or, am I average and boring, and having these kinds of thoughts makes me slightly less starkly plain?

Everyone but me was learning theory today. After awhile second hand theory is like second hand smoke. Unavoidable, sometimes suffocating, and perplexing.